Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
