DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
