Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
