I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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