Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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