there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
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After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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