I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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