I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Randomize
