So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
He passed out mid-signature
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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