I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I deserve to be covered in dicks
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Randomize
