Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I love having hate sex.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
It's not a walk of shame if you run
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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