Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize