I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
