dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Randomize
