Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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