You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
