4 words: hood of his car
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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