So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize