Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
