oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
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This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
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you are never too drunk for berry picking
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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