I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
