I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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