Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Randomize
