Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
