i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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