Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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