I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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