SEEEEXXX PLEASE
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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