Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
