we have officially lost it.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
