i jhust puked up my retainher.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
