I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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