New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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