when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
