I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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