is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
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