I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
