So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
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eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
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She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities