Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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