just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
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