on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
