LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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