I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
