It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
