i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Randomize
