I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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