you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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