Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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