Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
