okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
