Dual....:-)
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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