And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
